Thursday, August 11, 2005
2:45 AM
Im kinda playing around with colours at this point of time. Weird, I know.
Times been a little topsy turvey. But, It should be fine I guess. Talking to Ray, and thinking back about the questions he put me through. Sometimes i wonder, why did I fall for an Idoit like him. At times my answer will always be" because its his personality". Or am i actually more affected by his outlooks? I think, the base problem is looking back at these 3 weeks or 4. I have put in more than him. He might even be playing met he whole time. Or now, I jsut think everything he ask, seems to be another mind test he is putting me through. I think I am plain tired of everything. All the running emotions. All the things he should have understand, should have bothered. Simple things he said. But seriously, I don't think so. Playing with me? I guess I was played all along.
A lesson in life is always hard to learn. But the fruit of it, is the best experience we ever have.
Now, Life seems a little better. Broke my promise and took 4 sticks. But this time, I will be quitting slowly. My detoriating health. Poor lungs, heart, body.
Really got to set my foot down and study. Hmms. Or else, evelyn will kill me first. Precisly. so Dumped. hahha.
No love for me. Not now. It has been played.
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